Hemingway, Hyperbole and the Economy of Eloquence

In the past 5 days, I have spent no less than 20 hours answering emails, chatting on the phone with prospective clients and simply doing my best

By ian

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hemingway.jpg In the past 5 days, I have spent no less than 20 hours answering emails, chatting on the phone with prospective clients and simply doing my best to provide a meager measure of motivation to lots of upstart enterpreneurs trying to bust a big buck move in the online marketing space.  And beneath the bravado that most people wear like a cape of confidence ( an unfortunate byproduct of the "Get Rich by Tuesday" promise of the goofy guru set) is a persistent insecurity that keeps rearing it's ugly, insidious head in each conversation.

" But…I can't write"…..

" I'm not a copywriter".

" I LIKE TO USE BIG LETTERS WHEN I TYPE"

" I'm a good verbal communicator..But I just can't put the words down on paper ( or screen) well enough to sell my stuff"

The underlying uncomforatable reality is this:  Most people simply can't write well enough to move, motivate and massage their target audience to take the intended action on their offer. More than anything else…this simple truth permeates almost every financial failing project  that I have ever worked on…and people that I have worked for in that process.  And as our marketing machines muscle their way into proverbially overcrowded online steel cage spaces of increased competition and less wriggle room - and as blog comments, shared media and social networking sites rate, review and ridicule those who can't say what they want well - this reality will invariably become more haunting to your prospect of achieving any modicum of financial success online in the coming months and years ahead.

Remember…this is not just limted to the online marketing space.  If you are a Democrat - look at our present political predicament:  Barak Obama's long, loqacious speeches make me want to get off of my chair and take action…on something…(even when I am only listening with half an ear and have no idea what he's talking about).  This is the  beauty of perfect pitch, an inspired message highlighted by bullet points and a big promise……it's the Godfather guarantee at work - you want to get out…but it keeps pulling you back in!

The truth is - this is a gift.  And one that Santa hasn't dropped off at too many enterpreneurs home this Christmas, or last - and most likely…unless you dedicate yourself to nothing else other than mastering this particular poetic art of powerful printed persusasion…one that you probably won't have in your internet marketing arsenal any time soon.

So..what do you do? 

Hire it out?  You could - but as many direct marketing entrepreneurs know - there are only a handful of truly masterful copywriters out there…..and many of them command fees that are so exorbinant ( and arguably, in my opinion..obscenely overpriced) that unless you are willing to shit out 25,000 as a retainer - and suck on the sour apple sauce of giving up significant percentage of the profits as well….these folks are simply out of reach for the average small business owner.

You could contact me….But while I am better looking and a far better tennis player than those other guys….I ain't gonna be cheap either.

Look…Long sales copy does work.   I'm not going to lie.  And I don't care how much time people waste asking ridiculously innane questions ( does long copy work better than short?  And  why do I have a bellybutton?)  If I'm going to write a suave sales letter about my most redeeming qualities…even if you aren't going to read the whole thing - what makes more sense - one paragraph..or lots of paragraphs and pretty prose? 

The answer should be sufficiently self evident.

But…and this is a big ole butt.  If you are a terrible writer…or even just ok - and you run out of stuff to say quick - or can't say it well for long…you are FAR better keeping your message to market short, sweet and  powerfully pointed rather than droning on for four more pontificating paragraghs of painfully pointless prose. 

(advice I might have taken well here myself!)

It's the powerful pull of a minimalistic marketing message...and it can be equally as inspiring, illuminating and FAR easier to master.

There is the old story of Ernest Hemingway…when challenged to create a story in one paragraph or less…responded quickly with this:

Baby shoes for sale.  Never worn.

And while it takes a moment to sink in…this is indeed a complete and utterly compelling story - rich with a complete range of human emotions, feeling, failings and fears….and in many ways, like a great marketing message..incorporates the meanering imagination and projected hopes and fears of the reader to be emotionally effective. 

No amount of simple subheads and bullet points could ever communicate this particular power equally as eloquently.

But there aren't many Hemingways.  Or are there? 

I think, in this regard there may be….Because this type of copy is borne of simple creativity, and an earnest elegance that almost ALL of us have.  You can indeed learn to pare down your message into short, small bursts of inspired eloquence far FASTER than trying to tackle the tough terrain of long winded literature.

I fell in love with this site a while ago...and refer to it often in my own copywriting capers - and find inspiration here for myself, for client copy and for just the simple stuff of soulful salve. 

http://www.onesentence.org/

You don't need to fail - or find - someone else to master your own marketing message...even if you can't write a lick - you can go inward - and find what it most simple, inspiring and illuminating about your offer...capture it, own it and offer it sweetly and succintly - far better than a high priced hired gun can do in your behalf.  ( especially if you can't afford one!) 

Good luck..;-)

One Comment

  1. ian added these pithy words on February 27, 2008 | Permalink

    Note to self:

    You are a mother fucking genius.

    Thank you. And please do not forget to pick up meds in the morning.

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